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June 11, 2013
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falling asleep with the windows
open, with morning curling
around you like a drop of blue
ink in a glass of water,
turquoise and unwritten;

remembering when early dawn
was a secret you kept
in a soft, aortic pocket—

your dead lighter spinning
to the floor of Lake Ontario,
a halo of its bygone, synergetic flame.
Featured by *0hgravity [link]
:heart:


Fact: I was up all night wandering through your town on Google street view.

Trying to get back into this whole writing thing. Still can't do titles. I miss everyone here. :heart:
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:iconersatz-moon:
ersatz-moon Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
"Fact: I was up all night wandering through your town on Google street view."


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:iconorangecloudsraining:
orangecloudsraining Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013  Student Writer
ooh, the ache, the punch. :heart:
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:iconarchelyxs:
archelyxs Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2013
:heart:
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:iconlasagnabomb:
lasagnabomb Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013
dawww
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:iconarchelyxs:
archelyxs Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2013
:heart:
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:iconnullibicity:
Nullibicity Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh goodness, I just love this. The soft vulnerability peeks through lines and words within this piece, a sheen over the pain of loneliness. Your words were sometimes simple, but it conjured such complexity in thought and in emotion! I was inspired and awed by this!
I think my favorite (which is definitely hard to chose, given how it's all just wonderful!) was the second stanza and "... in a glass of water, turquoise and unwritten." The second stanza, itself, is such a lovely image, the metaphor so unique and unexpected that it sparks into your mind like a flame! I think this may be why I appreciated the mention of a lighter in the last stanza so much. As for the last two lines of the first stanza: holy crap. I never would have thought to say that water was unwritten. It's an obvious fact, but one that really gets no thoughts. Then to not only say blue but "turquoise." It was just such a thrill to read over that portion! What lovely, lovely words, and I felt they really sucked you in - like whirlpools - into the rest of the poem :love:
Fantastic job! I also, as a last addition, just loved the title: I felt it added a lot! :rose:
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:iconarchelyxs:
archelyxs Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2013
Thank you! I'm glad to hear this; I've been "off" of poetry for a little while and sometimes, you think you're leaving something alone but you don't realize how much you are improving? I chose these words very carefully, and I'm so glad to see that it's appreciated; thank you, dear :heart:
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:iconfoxenbochs:
foxenbochs Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I've struggled with insomnia for a long, long time, and I absolutely love this poem. This is just beautiful. :)
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:iconarchelyxs:
archelyxs Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2013
Thank you!
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:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2013   Writer
:heart:
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